Criminal Outreach Program
by Tikitookipok
Summary: Like children sent to some stupid camp so their parents can get rid of them, the Akatsuki members find themselves shamed with this new life after their respective deaths. The Konoha Criminal Outreach Program is designed to 'cure' their habits. can they escape with the help of a mysterious kunoichi? Or will they lose their humanity and wither away before achieving freedom?
1. Beginnings of an Alliance

"_Listen!" the man demanded, slamming his fist on the table. The woman on the other side of the wrath jumped and shrunk back as if surrendering. Her eyes spoke all the fear she felt. "I know you're clever! I know, because years ago when you told me about seeing myself surrounded by flames but not burning after people chanted my name, it came true. You knew. You knew I would become Hokage, and even though it sounded mocking and everyone turned on you, the words stuck with me."_

_The woman bowed her head and folded her hands together. "So I can pick out the destinies of some, so what? It's all chance. I have no control-,"_

"_I don't believe that for a second. You picked out the White Fang, too, and beat and tore him apart until he finally stood up for himself. You know destinies and how to make them come true... I need you to do me a favor, Zero."_

_She looked up, surprise evident in her eyes. "A favor?"_

"_Yes, a favor." The man paused to find the words and then continued. "I know you're blaming yourself for the White Fang's death- suicide. But so are others. His father is in a depression because he believes it's his fault. But it's no one's fault but the White Fang's."_

"_What are you getting at?" she snapped. The words hurt._

"_I have received a prophecy. The fifth and sixth Hokages will face unthinkable challenges that will either destroy the Shinobi World or strengthen it. We need it strengthened. Pick them out, help them realize their destiny, help them save the Shinobi World."_

_/_

Sasori grumbled to himself, fed up with the Konoha Nin talking down to them as if they were five-year olds. Yes, he understood that they were criminals. Yes, they were acting despite the law and being punished by the law. Yes, he understood all that. But he would have rather had the death penalty.

A criminal outreach program, really?

He rolled his eyes as the head of the program said "my friends" for the umpteenth time. The man didn't see them as equals so he shouldn't refer to them as equals, especially when Sasori knew he could cut a kunai across the Head's throat in a split-second.

The red-head shifted in his chair uncomfortably, looking around to see who else was present. Somehow he had been brought back to life, so he was determined to find out who else Konoha had resurrected as guinea pigs for this project. There were around two-hundred of them. A small class size, but a memorable one, the man would have said. 'Make life-long friends at the Konoha CrimPro.' 'A life-changing experience.' Life-changing because all their freedoms were taken away.

Blonde caught his eye. Deidara! Good, Sasori was content to know he'd have someone safe to complain to. The blonde glanced over and Sasori nodded at him. He returned the gesture and the two returned to pretending to listen. Sasori was more focused on the three criminals in front of him.

Two were male and one was female. They were passing notes on a folded-up sheet, using a bit of charcoal to write. One of the men was scribbling furiously and the other two looked as if they were about to burst as they held in their laughter. When the note was passed Sasori caught a glimpse. "Breast-Beater" it stated, with a crude picture next to it. He rolled his eyes again. Surrounded by idiots.

Directly to his left two respectable criminals were whispering quietly. Sasori strained to hear their hushed words. "When were you caught?"

"Off the eastern border. I was well asleep after a nasty fight with some Suna Nin when suddenly that damn pink-haired bitch up there woke me up. I wasn't prepared. She killed me, or so I thought, with a punch to the head."

The other ninja, a kunoichi, hissed. "She got Redd, too. And she thinks she's so special, look at her!" Sasori followed their gaze and saw the same pink-haired kunoichi that had killed him, standing tall and proud before the criminals.

But Sasori held a respect for her. Not just anyone could defeat Sasori of the Red Sands. She was one of the two exceptions… He shut his eyes and forced back all the memories, telling himself that they made him weak. The poor puppeteer wasn't sure why or how, but when he had been brought back to life he had been given a human body. He hated it. There was always this incessant need to eat, drink, sleep or whack off. It drove him crazy.

"Have you heard any of Zero?"

The name caught Sasori's attention. While he had never met this infamous criminal, he had heard plenty of stories about the Panther of the West, Zero. She worked alone, but would carry out odd missions here and there for reasons no one knew. She was a legend. All criminals aspired to be like her. She had made enemies of all the nations, sure, but she also had the ability to stay out of trouble, blending into the shadows when needed.

Those few that had met her and lived commended her. Sly and careful. She was the perfect criminal.

"Yes, I saw her earlier in here. She didn't have much of an expression on her face."

"Can you spot her? I was already yelled at once for looking around," the shinobi asked, shrinking in his seat as a well-armed guard came by. Sasori and the rest momentarily stopped everything they were doing until the man was out of ear shot, his boots clicking deftly as the Head droned on and on.

The kunoichi subtly looked around. Sasori followed her gaze. She shook her head in disappointment. "I don't see her. But come to think of it, she was surrounded by guards when I saw her. It's possible she's in a different assembly or something."

Sasori looked back to the front. If she wasn't here now Sasori figured he'd get to see her sometime before this awful "camp" was over. "You are dismissed to your dormitories," the man up front said. Everyone immediately got to their feet and made a break for it, too excited to get away from the dratted auditorium. Sakura was standing by the door with two other guards and a list in her hands.

"Azela Kumichi? Room 203. Rumiyard Koro, room 106."

Sasori approached when the general mass had shrunk with a smirk on his face. "Hello, again," he smoothly greeted. The pink-haired kunoichi didn't look the least bit put off, which kind of disappointed him. He had hoped his presence would at least have been a little bit disturbing. But his confidence was not to be daunted and when she looked up at him he held the same smirk he had died with.

"Akasuna no Sasori. Room 304." She narrowed her eyes, satisfying him. This was different treatment from the others, and he liked it. "I don't care who your roommate is. If we see you and the other Akatsuki members involved with anything suspicious you'll be _expelled." _One look at the guard's expression and Sasori knew she meant the death penalty.

"You were much nicer to me last time we met, Sakura-chan." Her eyes betrayed her disgust at the affectionate name. Sasori had achieved his goal. "Good-bye. And don't worry; I'll be your star pupil."

/\

A fist made contact across a face and some blood splattered to the ground. The girl in the chair clenched her teeth but didn't cry out, her eyes squeezing back tears. A man in black held a knife to her chin. "Look at me," he commanded.

The girl snorted. "Why would I listen to you?"

The knife slit her cheek, making an 'X' across another fresh wound. "I don't think you understand, miss. You are _marked._" The man growled at the bitterness in her eyes and sliced another line across her other cheek.

"No good deed goes unpunished," she said, more to herself than him.

He narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean?" He forced her to look at him again, this time much gentler. "You are the most renowned criminal, and we are not fools. We witness everything you say with apprehension, curiosity and, it may surprise you, respect. You are a powerful kunoichi. We know that. Otherwise we would never waste time trying to 'cure' your criminal tendencies." She spit blood in his face. He wiped it off on the back of his hand and smacked her across the face.

"That's enough, Ibiki." Another man stepped out of the shadows, silver-haired and a mask covering half his face. "She speaks in riddles, she always has. Ever since she and the Third Hokage were growing up, ever since she was little and she was ostracized from the Third's social groups in the Ninja Academy, she's never given straight answers. She's always been able to spin a tale, too."

"We can't trust her words," Ibiki concluded, nodding. He narrowed his eyes as she licked her bloody lips, staring at Kakashi as if a snake was dancing in front her, mesmerizing and dangerous.

"But we can analyze them," Kakashi spoke, breaking her trance.

"Kakashi?" she breathed, looking at him. They stared at each other, and neither could decipher the other's expression. Ibiki watched in interest. The woman had been close to Kakashi's father, the White Fang of Konoha, and he wanted to know what she had to say to his son. She took a deep breath, hoping to calm herself after the day's excitement. She gulped and spoke her mind: "You look so _old _now."

The next thing she remembered was waking up in an empty room.

/\/

Sasori walked down the carpeted hallway, looking at the hotel-like features. Everything looked the same. The same wall papers, the same poor lighting, the same pattern carpet, the same abstract pictures. He counted the room numbers. 304.

He pulled a key out of his pocket and opened the door, pushing it open to find an empty room. Odd, he was expecting to have roommate. There two beds, too. He shrugged and kicked off his shoes. And he stopped to think, again; what was he supposed to do now? He had no belongings.

A bit annoyed, he explored the room. Two beds, as noted before, were tucked into the furthest corner. They were adorned with white pillows and light red blankets. Good colors. Next to the beds were empty tables. There were two dressers near the door and two desks; he opened the dressers and found neatly folded uniforms.

"Oh, joy." They were gray and heavy cloaks. Black pants, shirts and undergarments were organized in the other drawers, and Sasori was feeling more like an inmate than ever. "I may have preferred death…" he told himself. Eyes shut, he could almost put a finger on what death was like… But then it slipped away and left him in familiar black, frustrating him that the memory of death was so evasive.

His fingers twitched. It unnerved the puppeteer that his chakra was so low, but he guessed it was done on purpose by the Konoha Nin so the criminals couldn't plan extensive escapes. He shook his head, hair swishing. It annoyed him greatly, but he needed to sleep.

So he simply took off his shirt and lay back on one bed, shutting his eyes and trying to clear his mind. But all he could think about were memories. He thought of yesterday, traveling from the place he had died with a full escort- it was flattering but humiliating all at the same time. Yes, Konoha realized his strength was not to be played with. But they held complete power over him, too- he could not have brought himself back to life.

He remembered the first time he had been left for dead.

"_Go to sleep," Granny Chiyo told a younger Sasori gently. "Go to sleep and your parents will be back in the morning." Little Sasori did as he was told and closed his eyes, listening for the receding footsteps of his grandma. She pulled up the covers and tucked the boy in. And then she lightly kissed his forehead, taking care to exit the room as quietly as possible._

_Sasori opened his eyes as the door clicked shut, sitting up and looking around the moon-lit room. He had a plan to find his parents. But what would he need to bring with him into the desert? Water, of course. Sliding out of bed, Sasori pulled a backpack from under his bed and began to fill it with the most important things he could think of: matches, some paper and a charcoal stick, kunai, shuriken and both his favorite puppet and his favorite toy, Red Sword the Mannequin and Little John the Teddy Bear. As a second thought he threw some food he had been saving for a time like this._

_Satisfied with his packing, he slapped the bag onto his back. Making as little noise as he could, he pried his window open and stepped into the freezing night. His breath made clouds in the air. He shook his head to clear all thoughts away but his main focus: finding his parents. His hair swished and swooshed with the motion._

_And off into the cold night Sasori ran, shivering as the still night turned into a biting wind rushing past his skin, nipping. He should have brought a jacket. But it was too late now- if he turned back Granny Chiyo would probably catch him and then his self-employed mission would be lost. _

_The boy exited the main gates of Suna with no problem. There were no guards on duty. That should have been his second sign to turn around and go back, the first had been the full moon; all Suna children were told gruesome tales of ghouls and wicked creatures that roamed the desert at night and were most powerful during the full moon. But the young Sasori was oblivious to the signs and didn't care for imaginative tales._

_But he did stop in awe when he came across several camels, dead. Their bodies were twisted and bloodied, obviously torn apart by something much larger than they. He shuddered. Wolves? He didn't know how big they got, but he imagined them to be enormous; and desert panthers, too._

_A roar. Sasori was carried off his feet by sharp claws digging into his back. Screaming in pain, he rolled away. A split-second later giant paws came crashing down where he had been and the thing attacking him yowled in anger. _

_His eyes widened and his jaw dropped. The young boy scrambled back in fear, heart thumping and pounding and beating as if the noise could scare away the giant panther before him. It was the size of a full-grown male grizzly bear. Blue eyes locked with his chocolate ones._

_The panther crept towards him, growling, its breath rank and teeth bloody. "Child," it snarled, "The bloodlust-!" Sasori squeezed his eyes shut as the paw rose with claws extended, ready to strike. But it never came. When he opened his eyes again a beautiful woman stood before him. Was she a goddess? The full moon floated behind her and Sasori knew he would never forget this moment._

_The woman prowled towards him. "Who are you?" She demanded, brandishing a menacing dagger. When Sasori didn't answer the dagger seemed to lash out of its own accord and leave a shallow cut above his eye._

"_I'm l-looking for my parents," he stammered, shaking. His fingers twitched and dug into the sand, trying desperately to unzip his bag and pull out Red Sword the Mannequin using chakra strings. The woman narrowed her eyes._

"_You came at the wrong time, boy. You're lucky I was able to stop myself," she growled. She stepped towards him. "But you've seen my face- I have no choice."_

"_NO!" he screamed, and Red Sword came to his rescue. The puppet lashed out with its sharp arm, missing the kunoichi by several inches. Claws were pricking his throat._

"_Don't try that again."Her hand struck his head, and he was thrust into unconsciousness._

Sasori opened his eyes. Clenching his teeth at the memory, he sat up and walked to the window. It was a beautiful night. The moon was only a sliver, but it was enough to outline the trees farther away, and Sasori could imagine the crickets chirping and a slight breeze to make the cool dark chilly. Green was a nice change. Sand grew old after time.

The red-head rested his head on the chilled window, closing his eyes once again. He did not know what tomorrow would bring, but he knew the anxiety in his stomach was logical.

When he woke a note was stuck to his forehead. Embarrassed and furious that anyone could sneak up on him in his sleep, he ripped the yellow paper from his skin, leaving a red mark. _Report to the Auditorium,_ it ordered in elegant handwriting. He took a deep breath. Today was day one.

/\/\

Head pounding, Zero sat up in the silent, vacant room. "Erg…" she groaned, shoving down the urge to puke. Wobbily, she stood. Looking around and breathing in, the woman could tell that she was in a recently built, clean building and that the room was generic. Except for the yellow post-it note on a dresser.

She stumbled to the note and gently ripped it off, reading the messy handwriting. _Rapurmu ta Audltorlom. _She scratched her head in confusion. What? She threw it to the side. Rapurmu ta Audltorlom? What the Hell was that supposed to mean? Black dots filled her vision- she had stood too quickly and her body began protesting. She lost her most recent meal on the floor.

Oh! She understood- Report to the Auditorium! The _i's, e's, o's, _and_ tt's_ had just been incredibly messy. Like her floor, now.

Zero touched her cheek. _X._ She sighed and rubbed her stomach in a pitiful attempt to calm it down. It hadn't been a dream- she really was in a criminal outreach program and she really had lost all freedom and dignity.

Stepping over the stinky puddle, she grabbed some type of cloak/cape/robe out of the dresser. Uniforms? Great. She put it on and took care to leave the door ajar so a janitor could come by and clean it up… if there were janitors… She hoped there were; otherwise she would spend as little time as possible because she didn't know how to _clean._ The word was foreign to her thoughts. Clean? Never.

The kunoichi turned left and walked down the hallway, hoping that it was the correct direction. The note hadn't been very informative; what time was it and what time was she supposed to be there? Her room didn't have a clock. Or a window.

"_**AUDITORIUM"**_ a sign in block letters shouted at her, with an equally blocky arrow jabbing the empty air beside it. Zero followed it. So down a different hall she turned, and became mesmerized by the same pattern of wallpaper, doors and lights over and over again; she didn't register the person in front of her until they collided.

"Oh- sorry!" she quickly apologized, helping the other person to their feet. An explosion sounded in her head.

"You better be, yeah!" the man snapped. He shrugged off her hands and stood, glaring at the kunoichi with a furious blue gaze. A camera over his right eye whirred. "You almost sent us both tumbling down the stairs!" His long blonde hair swayed with each motion.

Zero blinked and peered around him. Oh! Stairs! "Sorry," she mumbled, face flushing in embarrassment. "The hallways… are the same…" It was a pitiful excuse, and she became even more ashamed of her ninja skills. First capture, then interrogation, now this.

He shook his head and his angry eyes became a little more understanding. "I know, they're hypnotic, yeah. I'm positive it's on purpose- it's almost like a form of genjutsu." He turned. "C'mon. We're probably late, hmm?"

Zero followed the man as he glided down the stairs, a penguin following an eagle. She didn't know who he was, but she had guessed he was a criminal just like she, and that meant they had a common enemy at the moment. So that made them allies.

The blonde seemed to know exactly where he was going, and Zero voiced her concern. "How do you know where the auditorium is?"

He glanced back. "We were just there yesterday, don't you remember? For our introduction and room assignments." When she didn't express any familiarity with the place he turned around with narrowed, calculating eyes. "You weren't there, were you? Who are you?"

Zero opened her mouth to respond but quickly shut it. She knew her name was renowned as the best/worst criminal, depending on whose side one was on. But hardly anyone knew her face. She could tell him and probably witness either an attempt to kill her or groveling, and to be honest she really didn't want to deal with either. "Valjean," she lied.

The man didn't seem satisfied. "What the Hell kind of a name is that?" he growled. "It sounds like randomly thrown together syllables," he accused.

She shook her head and protested, "It's not, really! It's the main character from a book my mother read all the time." Zero watched his face, desperately hoping that what she had made up was believable. Jean Valjean really was a character from Victor Hugo's _Les Miserables,_ but who would name their child after that?

He took the name. "Nice to meet you, Valjean. I'm Deidara." He stuck out his hand and Zero took it, giving it a healthy shake. "We're almost there, at any rate, yeah. So let's keep going."

And he didn't lie. Less than a minute later they walked through two hefty doors and entered a large auditorium with chairs set up in rows. "Where do we sit?" Zero asked.

Deidara shrugged. "Anywhere, yeah. Why don't you sit with me, hmm? I can introduce you to a friend or two, if I can find any." He must have spotted one of his friends, because he took off with a surprising speed- Zero had to run to keep up. "Sasori-danna!" he shouted.

A red-head turned to see who had called his name. He nodded. "Deidara." The man was standing alone, and Zero couldn't help but admire his strong, confident, relaxed demeanor. Zero was nowhere near relaxed. Wooden joints clicked together in her mind. Ah, so he was a puppet master?

"It's nice to see you again, Danna, yeah!"

The red-head responded, "It is good to see you again as well. Now tell me, did they take you alive or did you get yourself killed like I always predicted?" Deidara scowled and gave the man enough of an answer. "Who is your friend?" His eyes held some sort of spark in them that Zero couldn't quite place a name on.

Zero bowed her head to him. "Valjean, it is a pleasure to meet you, Sasori-Danna." Deidara smirked as Sasori rolled his eyes.

"Don't call me that. Only Deidara is allowed to get away with that, and that is only because he might blow up this entire room if he didn't get his way."

"Sorry," Zero muttered. Determined not to let them see her awkward embarrassment, she rubbed an older scar and looked around to see how many people were in the auditorium. "Any important people here?"

Sasori snorted at the question. "Important people? I think all the criminals are pretty important, otherwise Konoha wouldn't bother trying to bring them back to life and 'cure' them." He held his head high, examining the ninja again.

Zero scowled. "So who are you?"

"He said already, Valjean, yeah!" Deidara laughed at their interaction, eyes gleaming with the prospect of future pranks. "Sasori- we were both in the Akatsuki. I know it's hard to tell without our cloaks," he explained, motioning to the uniforms everyone was wearing. "What about you, hmm? What sort of horrible things did you do before they killed you?"

"I, well… I haven't been killed yet," Zero hesitantly told them.

"What!?"

"Deidara, calm down. It makes sense, not all the troubling criminals are dead. If they were they'd keep us dead, but obviously they need knowledge to catch a powerful criminal outside of their fingers and we may have that knowledge." Sasori's expression was almost bored. Zero didn't like his arrogance- it was practically flowing out of his ears.

Deidara nodded. "Makes sense, yeah. So?" His eyes grew playful. "What have you done? Any," he raised his eyebrows suggestively, "Unspeakable things, yeah?"

"No. Thank you for the suggestion, though. I'll be sure to add that to my list of things to do," Zero sarcastically shot back.

"Oh, look, Deidara," Sasori smirked, "You've made her angry."

"Shut up, ginger," Zero growled. Sasori's face became unreadable as some emotion flitted across it for half a second, but then his smirk returned. "I don't think I've done anything unheard of- kill some jounin, ANBU, raid some carts, the usual."

"I highly doubt that would earn you any more of a title than a nuisance," Sasori replied, eyes narrowed in suspicion. "So tell us, what's your real name?" At Zero's face he knew he had guessed correctly. "Ah, so I am right. Valjean is not your real name and you _have_ done something unthinkable."

Zero looked away, hoping to see someone she might know. But then she remembered- she was with criminals. Who did she know and care about that was a criminal? Everyone she loved was on the other side of things.

She took a deep breath. "My name's Zero, and the unthinkable, horrible, gruesome thing I did was to run away from a mission the Hokage gave me." She wasn't feeling very proud, but she put on a mask because she knew the knowledge of her name would spread like wildfire.

Deidara's eyes widened and Sasori closed his eyes to fight back the memories. The reveal didn't have the effect he had been expecting; he had been prepared for triumph, but the fear that seized his stomach nearly carried him off his teeth. This was her- the woman panther that had nearly killed him so many years ago. "Zero!" Deidara practically yelled. "It's an honor! You know, the Akatsuki were going to try and recruit you- you're a very respectable person."

"Respectable for criminals isn't exactly respectable," Zero sourly replied. Deidara grinned. He thought she was likeable, he looked forward to getting to know her better.

"Jean Valjean, the convict on the run?" Sasori asked. "Victor Hugo, correct? Well, how about we keep your identity a secret, Valjean? There must be a reason you wanted it to be kept secret, and perhaps later the three of us can get to know each other better. When we're alone." He hissed; a guard was coming close.

All three grew quiet and the guard clicked by. Zero nodded. "Sounds great," she replied once the guard was past, "I look forward to it, Sasori, Deidara." The Head took the stage then. They sat down.

"Good morning!" The Head bellowed with a fake smile plastered to his face. "Please, take your seats, friends! We have much to do today!" He clapped his hands together. "Whoo! It's hot in here, isn't it? How were your rooms last night?"

There was no answer. Zero looked up at the ceiling, counting lights in a hope to blind herself and be excused forever. Deidara fiddled with his cloak. Sasori's expression was blank, but his eyes gave away his exasperation ever so slightly.

"I'm glad to hear they were so wonderful! Well, today we have an exciting schedule for all of you, and I hope you're ready for the funnest day of your life!"

"Is that a word?" Someone asked behind the three.

"Please grab three other people and come up to the front where our lovely, kind assistants will give you your schedule for the week!" His face was growing red and sweat was shining on it. Zero felt sorry for him that speaking in such a hot room was enough to push the heavy-set Head over the edge of decent public appearance. Enormous sweat stains already adorned his shirt.

"Us three," Deidara decided, "And someone else." He shot up and shouted at the top of his lungs, "ITACHI!" Zero yelped in surprise and clutched her heart. Deidara waved wildly. Sasori put his head in his hands, determined to show everyone watching the crazy blonde that Sasori didn't enjoy associating himself with him.

A tall man approached, and Zero narrowed her eyes to scrutinize him. If Deidara hadn't just shouted his name she would have been sure he was Sasuke Uchiha, the bastard that had joined forces with Orochimaru.

A flash, an image of blood and violence, and Zero understood. Ah, Itachi Uchiha. She remembered now- he had massacred the entire clan in one night, save his little brother. He nodded to them, the tiniest motion.

"It looks like we have our group," Sasori remarked and stood, pushing his way through the crowd. "I'll get the paper."

Zero bowed in respect. "A pleasure to meet you, Itachi Uchiha. I am… Valjean," she told him uncertainly.

"We'll tell you later," Deidara told the man. Sasori returned and saved them from any further conversation. "Lemme see that!" he snatched the paper away from an annoyed Sasori. "Ooh! Talking time! In our rooms!" He winked at Zero. "Shall we go to yours?"

Zero grimaced. "No… I… made a mess this morning, we should avoid it." Deidara looked at her strangely, and she could see the thousands of dirty possibilities that crossed his mind. "Upchucked," she growled. All his thoughts halted, disappointed.

"Oh. Well, we can use mine, then."

They soon found themselves in Deidara's room with Itachi leaning against the window, Deidara on his own bed, Sasori on the other, and Zero sitting on the floor. Sasori was the first to speak. "Talk," he commanded Zero, who scowled at the order.

"I don't know what else you want me to say," she growled. "My name's Zero and you all know me just like I know all you." She focused her eyes on the floor.

That wasn't good enough. "Go on, tell us everything," Sasori smoothly coaxed her. She glared at him, and Sasori felt the slightest touch of a shudder. He would never forget the image of this woman prowling toward him, ready to kill. "At least how you got here. We need to be able to trust each other in order to get out of here."

She listened to reason. "I was… bargained with. I killed the war-hungry Mizukage and barricaded myself in his office," she began. Furrowing her brow, she remembered what Kakashi had said about her always speaking indirectly and spinning a tale. It was only when she needed to. She didn't need to now, so she wouldn't.

"On the other side of the door they agreed to keep me alive if I surrendered unconditionally."

"So you did?" Deidara asked incredulously.

Zero nodded. She knew they wouldn't understand the vision that had encompassed the decision, the tantalizing promise of a home during a time of sure peace. "I did. The next thing I remembered was yesterday- I was interrogated."

"That explains the fresh wounds," Sasori concluded.

"And why you bowled me over in the hallway," Deidara agreed. "And I suppose the puke in your room as well."

Zero shrugged. "More or less." She looked up and when her eyes rested on Sasori she felt something in the back of her mind, like a vision not quite ready to reveal itself. "What about you guys?"

Sasori answered her question. "As we discussed before, all three of us were part of the Akatsuki. I was killed by that pink-haired kunoichi." He turned to Itachi and Deidara. "I still have yet to hear what happened to the two of you."

Deidara scratched his head, suddenly unwilling. "I blew myself up to kill some Leaf Nin." Normally, he'd be proud to boast of his greatest art, but its purpose had entirely missed base. He hadn't killed his targets. And if it didn't obtain its purpose, art was worthless.

Sasori sensed his partner's shame and didn't press further. All this was shameful. Itachi didn't look away from the window while he answered, "My little brother got his vengeance." That caught Zero's attention. Really? That was certainly not something Zero had seen in Sasuke's future.

"And now we're all alive here…" Zero finished, quietly. She pressed a finger to the carpet and traced it, memorizing the texture and exact shade. No one broke the silence. It was silently agreed by all of them that this was the last place they would ever want to be, stuck among other criminals and unable to pursue their individual goals. "What's next on the list?"

Deidara unfolded the papers. He rubbed his brow and answered, "Someone's supposed to stop by and lead us to breakfast. After that we have icebreaker games with the others…" he groaned. "I hate icebreaker games."

"I feel your pain," Zero muttered.

_Knock, knock._

Itachi opened the door, moving across the room in a flash, startling Zero. "Uh, no." That was all it took for Sasori to recognize the person. He stood and inclined his head, smirking.

"What's wrong, Sakura-chan?"

She stepped into the room and stared at each one of the criminals in turn. "I don't think this group dynamic is in the best interest of the individual members." A glare at Sasori answered most of their questions. She was most definitely the one that had killed Sasori, and obviously she knew most of the Akatsuki members.

"How long did you have to rehearse that?" Deidara snorted.

Sakura looked at Zero. "How do you fit in with them?"

Zero pointed at Deidara. "He's practically a girl, and we're all bloodthirsty murderers."

"Fit right in," she muttered. Glancing at them all again, she pointed to Sasori. "You, out. You will be moved to another group, and someone else will be moved in here. And none of you will put up a fight over it."

"Come on," Zero immediately piped up. A sense of duty flowed off Sakura, and Zero respected that despite this there was a significant current of kindness and sympathy. Not commonly found in ninja. But in Zero's experience she had found that those made ninja great. "None of us have enough chakra to actually do anything. We've lost all dignity and sense of pride; all we have are our names and the few people that knew us before this. Let us at least hang onto that. It's the only shred of decency we can muster."

Sakura blinked. The sympathy was slowly overtaking the duty. "You were the one that threw up in your room, right?"

Zero cursed and looked down at the floor in embarrassment. "Yeah."

"After breakfast tell one of the guards that I need to see you privately." She left. A small _whoosh_ of relief sounded. Together, a small alliance, banded in the face of shame, and Zero knew would rise to recognition in the face of danger.

**Tell me what you think, please! Hope you enjoyed, and happy reading and writing wherever you wander next.**


	2. Tightening the Noose

Zero flopped back onto her bed with a groan. She was dead tired; apparently when the schedule said "Free Time" it meant running killers for four hours. Not that she didn't need the exercise, but she didn't want so much all at once when it coincided with the nastiest headache and stomachache. Sakura had passed her magical hands over Zero's stomach earlier and diagnosed her. Just a virus. Or flu. You know, nothing to be worried about.

So here Zero was now. Clutching her stomach, Zero took a few deep breaths to calm herself and tried to fall into the welcoming blackness of sleep. No such luck. Lifting herself out of bed, she knelt on the floor. The puke was gone, most definitely gone, and that meant she could continue with her plan.

She lay on her stomach and pressed her face into the floor. Nice and cool. Something was a bit off about the carpet underneath her skin, but she didn't care enough to take more notice. Zero kicked her socks off and pulled her sweatshirt off. The air felt good on her sweaty back, and soon enough sleep hit her like a train.

It didn't last long. At least, Zero felt like she only blinked before an ANBU shook her awake and ordered her to stand. Groggily, she obeyed. On unsteady feet she followed the man out the door, through the mesmerizing hallways, down a dark stairwell that seemed to go on forever, and into a bright white room.

She groaned quietly. "Sit down," the ANBU commanded in a soprano voice. Whoops, bad judgment on Zero's part. Most definitely a woman, not a male ninja.

"On the floor?" Zero asked, eyes squeezed shut against the light. She stumbled forward and ran into a chair, nearly tumbling over it onto her back. "Oh." She steadied it and herself, taking a seat on it. Finally, her eyes adjusted.

She glanced up to see the ANBU had removed her mask. "Excuse me," Zero stammered, looking away. It felt indecent to view a masked ninja without their mask, she thought. Shivering lightly, she examined the room more closely.

Oddly shaped was the first thing to cross her mind. Instead of rectangular or square, the room was shaped inarguably into a triangle base with a dome top. Huh. The floor was made up of one giant slab of cement, and there were two doors on opposite sides of the room, also painted starch. The ANBU stood to Zero's left.

"Kakashi will be here shortly."

"More questioning." It wasn't a question because Zero expected nothing different. When the ANBU laughed she jumped.

"Something different. Something more fitting."

Zero stared at the pointy walls, deep in thought. What could they do to get the information they wanted? "I have nothing to offer. Let me go back to sleep; I'm far more useful there than here. And then you can sleep, too, or keep an eye on much more dangerous criminals than me."

"Kakashi will be here shortly."

/

"That Zero's a bit of a sour-puss, yeah?" Deidara remarked as she left the dining hall. Bed-time was right after supper, and she had chosen to duck out early to sleep a bit more. The three watched curiously to see if she made it past the guards. She did.

Itachi made no move to answer, but Sasori nodded. "That's really Zero… As of right now, I do not see why Leader had his eye on her." A blatant lie, of course, but it went by undetected. Sasori had a deep fear for the woman that had almost halted his life when he was younger. That brought another point of curiousity to the table. How had she not aged? Aside from a few more scars, she looked the same as she had all those years ago, beautiful and dangerous.

"Maybe it was for her body."

"Wishful thinking, Deidara."

"I think there's more to her than she's showing," Itachi quietly put in. She had killed the Mizukage after all. Anyone with that strength was bound to be targeted by the Akatsuki, even if they didn't flaunt their skills. Zero was smart. Showing off usually made fatal enemies.

"I suppose there was more to Tobi than we saw, too, yeah?" Deidara turned back and stabbed at some elusive spaghetti on his plate. "I could use some more food, un." That seemed to be the general consensus around the dining hall; the criminals were muttering crossly to themselves.

Sasori surveyed the group once more. "What do you suppose they plan to do with us?" he asked. Placing his chin in a hand, he stared across the room where the Head, Sakura, and the Fifth Hokage were eating. Interesting.

"Probably more man-power," Itachi responded. "I see the Hokage is here."

"I noticed that, too." Sasori set his hand down and leaned back in his chair. Deidara looked up to see the Hokage walking towards their table, a smirk on her face that made Sasori wanted to wipe off with a knife. "Oh, joy."

She stood by them, refusing to sit down. "I see none of you made it nearly as far as you thought you would."

"We have a second chance, yeah," Deidara snapped back, eyes narrowed. If he had all his chakra he knew he could force the Hokage into submission. But words would have to settle for now. She opened her mouth to say something, and then apparently saw someone or something more important than them because she left without another word, never looking back.

Sasori glared at her receding back. That was a low blow, even for a Leaf Nin; they may be condescending but _that?_ Implying that they were _nothing_ now? That ground his gears. When he got out he would give Konoha Hell for all this, twice over, whether anyone was with him or not.

A glance to his companions and Sasori knew the expression was shared.

_Brrring! Brring!_

The bell pounded into their ears. It felt like school all over again; bells were put in place because for some odd sociological reason the criminals were more likely to listen to the bell than to guards directing them where to go. Itachi fingered his knife, playing with the idea of bringing it with him. But in that same second of consideration he concluded that the knife was too dull for its intended use, and to be caught with it would probably be for the worse. He grabbed the spoon instead.

Sasori raised his eyebrows a fraction. A silent exchange and Sasori looked away; Deidara was oblivious to it all. His focus was on avoiding contact with a rather questionable female. Before she had caught whatever STD she sustained currently she had probably been beautiful; right now the purple boils wrapping around her skin and the pus leaking from her nose and ears weren't for the best first impressions. The blond shuddered visibly after she was gone.

Nodding their parting words, the three separated silently to their respective rooms. Deidara immediately went to bed. Sasori tried to stay up, but the silence in the room eventually lulled him to bed. Itachi glanced around the room, trying to locate a decent hiding spot for the spoon; the organizers had been stupid enough to give him a window. Sure, it was on a ridiculous floor level, but it was still hope.

Under his pillow? No, too obvious. Mattress? No. Drawers? No. He let out a puff of breath. The room looked clean and picked over, his bed made and floor vacuumed. Other people came in here daily. An idea popped into his head.

Grabbing a pen out of the drawer of his bed-side table, he scribbled elegantly on a pad who also resided in the drawer: _Silverware Percussion._ Stupid enough that it might actually work.

He set the spoon down on the table and stuck the note under it. Tomorrow, he'd snatch another spoon. Maybe even a cup. He was sure that whoever cleaned these rooms were bound to find much more "quirky" things than this lying in "hidden" places. He had to hope, at least. Tomorrow would tell him if this plan would work.

/\

Zero had to be woken up again. Apparently "soon" for Kakashi meant "four hours later," and so naturally the women had fallen asleep. It had been the mixed result of both being tired and trying to awkwardly make small talk with the ANBU kunoichi. Unconsciousness had seemed a better alternative.

Her eyes adjusted to the light to reveal Kakashi standing before her, book in hand. Upon seeing her awake, he snapped it shut. "Hello, again. How do you like your new accommodations?"

"I threw up in them."

"I see. Giving it a smell closer to home, right? Anyways, we've brought you here today to see exactly what defines home for you." He slid his headband up. Zero glanced away out of politeness, then decided being rude might be to her advantage. Sharingan. "You recognize this, I see. Is it because you have become acquainted to Itachi Uchiha?"

"Or is it because I have wandered the world out of justice's grasp for so long that I've come to know secrets deeper than the famous Uchihas' Kekkai Genkai?"

Kakashi pulled a piece of yellow chalk out of his pocket. Zero tilted her head to one side and narrowed her eyes, unsure what to make of this. Motioning the ANBU over, he gave her that stick and produced another one. He knelt and began drawing on the floor.

Zero watched them with apprehension. She had heard of another ninja using jutsu involving drawing symbols, but because the criminal was the ever-elusive Orochimaru she had yet to be able to observe one in action. She guessed today was her lucky day. "Have an open-mind today, Zero."

"Or a set standard of morals. Your father knew about morals, Kakashi. He was a good man."

The chalk snapped. "Don't talk to me about my father," Kakashi calmly told her. Zero masked her small triumph. She now knew what could possibly get him to blow up in an outrage. The ANBU kunoichi was silent during all of this. "This can go quite smoothly if you give us your cooperation."

"What is 'this'?"

"Show us the technique that has kept you hidden all these years, Zero." He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, outside of the odd shape he and the woman had drawn on the cement. Zero briefly thought of children playing outside in the summer.

She shrugged. "If you go to the ninja academy they could show you the very same techniques. It's nothing special. Substitution, shadow copies, the usual escape methods. You can use them effectively in a fight, and so can I," she said, staring evenly at Kakashi. She wouldn't let that one eye bother her. A brief image of Kakashi's history never came to Zero, and so she just decided she had to wait patiently and see if he explained how he got that eye. Maybe Itachi would know.

The ANBU scoffed. Kakashi nodded and sternly ordered, "Tell the truth. There is more to you than meets the eyes."

Zero rolled her eyes. "If there was more to me than that, then I would be living comfortably in a pile of gold, on an uncharted island away from people. No enemies and no danger." Glancing down, she scuffed her feet on the floor, trying to reach the chalk and muddle it. No such luck. Being in the center of this pentagram was rather alarming, and she desperately wanted out.

Kakashi sighed. "This could have gone easier." He motioned for the ANBU ninja to start up. Behind Zero, she made hand signs and stepped out of the pentagram. The Copy Cat Ninja lifted his arm and cut one slit on his hand with a kunai, allowing the blood to drip into the shape. Zero jerked back. Maybe if she could tip the chair over and run for it…

Pain. Suddenly, Zero found herself glued to her chair and unable to move. It felt like there was an electrical current running up and down her spine, making her grit her teeth. Around her the chalk lines had begun to glow a gentle orange. Anywhere else, she might have passed it off as light from a torch. But not right now.

"Tell the truth now, how you managed to escape us for so long."

Zero found her mouth moving without her consent, disturbing her greatly. "A combination of lots of substitutions and shadow clone, luring ninja away. And avoiding direct confrontation." An inkling of relief penetrated her chest. She had not given away her secret.

But Kakashi would have nothing but what he determined the full truth. Eyes narrowed, he commanded, "Tell us your secret. What makes you great? What do you hide from the outside world?" Zero shook her head, and he mouth stayed shut even though the pain intensified into blinding agony. "Then show us."

That was it. Against her will her body transformed. The chair tipped and from spilled a full-grown, scarred panther with a snarl that inferred an enormous appetite for all who annoyed it. Both Kakashi and the ANBU jumped back; they hadn't been expecting this.

Snarling, the panther attempted to spring forward. Its muscles rippled and its teeth shone bright in the orange glow, its eyes becoming dancing flames of fury. Instead it fell flat to the floor as Kakashi raised his hand in defense. "Go back." Slowly, grudgingly, Zero appeared on the floor. "We're done," he muttered. The glowing stopped. Zero found that she could twitch her limbs now.

Before she could even feel anything, the ANBU knocked her out.

When she woke she was in her bed, body throbbing faintly and feeling incredibly violated and helpless. They had managed to force her into submission. All her cards were revealed in a friendly game, and now friends and strangers alike were mocking her for keeping such a hand when she could have scrapped it a few seconds ago, despite it being her first time so much as seeing the game. Humiliating.

She wished she knew what time it was. Was it worth trying to get past the feeling of shameful helplessness and try to sleep, or was it better to just stay awake? Shuddering, she pulled the blankets tighter around her. She never wanted to be so exposed like that again, and so unable to defend herself.

Sleep was about to hit her. Then the door knocked. "Time to get up!"

She groaned. This was going to be a long day.

/\/

"You don't look so good, yeah."

Zero shrugged, moving food around on her plate but not really eating the burnt hashed browns or greasy eggs. Even her orange juice went untouched. Her mind was still on last night. "Didn't sleep well," she murmured. Deidara sensed that there was more than that, but he figured it was best not to press further into the private life of the infamous Panther of the West. There was a code, even among criminals. Every relation is business, nothing more, so it is not necessary to know what brings a person into their circumstances as long as it does not endanger the task at hand. A code of politeness, in other words.

Sasori didn't like the way she stared blankly at her food. Even if he'd only known her maybe a day, it was still a great change from yesterday and that night all those years ago. Itachi noticed this, too, but he also was quiet and respected her space. And he was trying to stuff a cup and spoon into a pocket, which was much easier said than done in the stupid program uniforms.

And then that woman walked by again. All four tried not to stare at her, but it was fairly difficult. Deidara shuddered once again. Itachi wondered to himself what on earth had struck her immune system down like a pig in the slaughter house. Disgusting. Sasori had seen enough things like that that he just rolled his eyes. Stupid women.

Zero saw something else entirely.

She paled and looked down, feeling the sudden need to throw up. At least Kakashi hadn't been able to discover that part of her abilities; for a while longer at least, she could keep this to herself. She had control.

Deidara noticed her reaction and smirked. "Disgusting, yeah?"

Zero nodded in reply, setting her fork down. All done.

"I'm sure you're glad none of your mysterious suitors never had that, hmm?"

She rolled her eyes and stared expectantly at him.

"What?"

"Anything more to say?"

"No, un. " He waggled his eyebrows. "Hit a mark, didn't I?"

"Not everyone is as promiscuous as you, you know. I'm sure Itachi could be an open book about his sexual relations just as I am." Ouch. Itachi looked up, unsure of what do as the butt of the joke. Sasori suppressed a right out laugh.

"I'm not a virgin," Itachi weakly protested. Wrong move. Deidara immediately dug in, asking the most profane question that could cross a man's mind. Zero watched this with a smile but steadily zoned them out.

Sasori watched her, trying to guess what was crossing her mind. But who can read a panther's mind?

/\/\

Tsunade folded her hands and held them in front of her mouth. So that was the Panther's secret. Very interesting. But how far could that go? Could that one power really encompass and explain everything she had done? She supposed it could. Give her the right friends and training and it could definitely take anyone by surprise and hide her identity.

Sighing, she waved them away. "Kakashi, stay." He closed his book as the others left. The door clicked. Silence. "What do you think is our next move?"

He weighed the options in his mind. "I suppose we can just wait and continue forward with the program. Maybe the next step is in order, as well, before the prisoners start to get… rowdy." He pictured a few of the muttering groups when he had walked through for a general look during lunch. It hadn't even been a day.

She nodded. "As should be expected. Slowly tighten the noose; tell Sakura. In five days we'll start the real program. Keep a watch on Zero, her friends, and the Akatsuki and their friends."

This is where Kakashi wanted to cringe and run like a whipped puppy. "Actually, the Akatsuki and Zero are… mutual friends…"

"_What?"_

_/\/\/_

Sasori rolled his eyes as he walked past couples in the hall. They were going about their gooey, gushy business and reassuring each other that they were going to escape and run away together from this place. Zero, Deidara and Itachi walked behind him. On the schedule right now was listed "Establishing Bonds." Spending time with friends.

All three Akatsuki members averted their eyes; Zero was too lost in thought to look up from the carpet. That woman with all the boils and pus had deeply disturbed her. Not just on that level of "you can't un-see it once you've see it," but also on the level of seeing impending doom for thousands. She was jerked out of her thoughts when they halted their journey- she nearly ran into Itachi.

Reaching the room number, Sasori put the key into the knob and then twisted the door open. The temperature difference was noticeable. He entered the cool bedroom first and the other three followed, thankful to be out of sight of all those couples and away from the humidity of too many bodies in one place. "How'd you get stuck with that, yeah?"

Sasori shook his head. "I don't know."

"You have a window, too," Itachi remarked. Then he produced the spoon from his pocket and extended it to Sasori. The puppeteer raised an eyebrow. "It'd be a good lever to pry the window open with, if we decide on a good time to escape."Sasori's questioning instantly vanished and he took the spoon gratefully. Why hadn't he come up with that? "I do not know where you can hide it. Someone goes through our rooms daily, and I have a feeling they will try and confiscate anything suspicious."

"Did you hide a spoon in your room?" Zero asked. The entrance into a new room and the prospect of escape had shaken away all thoughts of that pus-covered woman at breakfast.

Itachi nodded. "I wrote a note saying it was the start of a percussion set… I have a cup to add to it." He revealed the cup, earning a laugh from Zero and Deidara. Seemed legit.

"I have a window, too. I'll grab a spoon at breakfast, yeah! You too, Zero, hmm?" He looked at the woman expectantly.

She shrugged. "I don't have a window."

"That certainly presents a problem," Sasori stated. He placed his spoon on his bed. The other bed remained empty. "Deidara, do you have two beds in your room, too? Good. Then maybe we can escape tomorrow night…"

"You really think so, un?"

Sasori and Itachi glanced at each other. With a nod, Sasori walked to the window and pointed, "When the moon clears the treetops we'll try and get the windows open. Then we'll have to try and meet somewhere. Don't wait up for anyone around this building; I have a feeling it's crawling with guards day and night."

"Transformation Jutsu?" Zero suggested.

"And meet at a restaurant or something, yeah?"

Itachi nodded. "I know of a famous Ramen Shop in Konoha. Have you all heard of Ichiraku Ramen? It's open late into the night and is decently far from here, but not too far." All three nodded. Zero remembered that place clearly, having been there more than once before.

"Alright," Itachi finished. He figured he was done talking for the night.

"_Attention. Attention. The time for establishing bonds has been cut short. Please head back to your respective rooms. Tomorrow will be a big day. Thank you."_ All three looked at each other. The voice had been muffled since it had been out in the halls over the loudspeakers, but they had still heard it.

"What do you suppose has happened?" Zero asked, feeling the start of impending doom. She remembered last night a bit too clearly; she didn't want to go back to her room to wait for ANBU to disrupt her sleep again. She didn't want to give anything more about herself away.

"I don't know, yeah. I suppose we better listen, though. Come on," he gestured to the door. "Don't want to get on their bad sides."

"We're Akatsuki, Deidara," Sasori pointed out as they moved to the door. "I think we've always been on their bad side." Deidara laughed, and then all three were gone. Absently, Sasori wondered where Sakura had wandered off today. Sure, it had only been two days in this hellhole, but he had figured there would be some sort of regularity to what they did and who they saw. Guess not.

Well, whatever came next wouldn't matter. They would be gone in one more day.

/\/\/\

"My spoon was in my room yesterday."

"I left mine in the open, no note or anything. I'll take an extra back just in case."

"Mine will be in my pocket, yeah."

"I'll grab all the silverware and bring it to Deidara's room, in case we need to pry open a pancake or meatloaf or something."

"Good." Sasori glanced around. "Breakfast is almost done. Think the day will be like yesterday and the day before, or completely different?" The criminals were beginning to stand up and leave, to wander the halls until the bell rounded them up to the gymnasium. For the first time he noticed a couple other infamous people. Like Zabuza.

Itachi shrugged. "I hope it's like the other days."

It wasn't. At that moment the Head stood up in front of them and, smiling, announced, "Welcome to the corrective part of the camp life!" Would Konoha actually do anything to them, or was it just a false threat? No one took the words seriously. The chattering started up again.

"Bullshit!" A voice shouted.

The Head continued smiling. A sound like rain hitting pavement was heard just below the hum of chatter, and Zero glanced back to see a headless body fall to the floor, a stoic guard behind it. _Thud._ Not a false threat. She tore her gaze away, the crowd of criminals growing silent. "Anyone else?" the Head asked. "Good."

_Brrring! Brrring!_

"If your room is on the top floor, please report to the gymnasium immediately," the Head ordered, shirt becoming stained once again with sweat. "The rest of you return to your rooms. Please co-operate with the ninja that will be coming into your rooms. If you do not, you will be prosecuted."

He need say no more. The three watched Itachi get up and leave for the gymnasium. "Tonight," he whispered. They didn't nod in response, but they all heard him perfectly. Sasori stood, too. Deidara and Zero watched him go towards the stairs, and then they stood, too.

"Tread carefully, Valjean," Deidara whispered. His one blue eye seemed genuinely concerned. "If you're not in my room tonight I'll come get you." Zero nodded. She stepped to walk in front of him, past the stone-faced guards. Both she and Deidara figured it was best not to talk to each other too much in front of the enemy.

The sick woman was in front of Zero. She closed her eyes against the sight.

Spiders. So many spiders.


End file.
